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IF.
If only my wife could weed by touch she could begin work in the dark hours. If only she could also use her feet as well as her hands she would be twice as fast. If only she could learn to vacate the bed and leave me conversing with my porcine friends. If only I had a whip. Oink! Oink! Fortunately, her skin is waterproof, so she can toil in all weathers.

Of course, I jest, but seriously (rare for me): since two strokes disabled me Sheila has taken over looking after the hens, garden and me. She is doing a wonderful job. Her little girls and garden are a credit to her - possibly I am not. Thanks; it is appreciated. Love, Ed.